Hi.

Neauxlamade is a safe space to freely express myself as I explore motherhood, the arts, and self-love. I share my journey through life, discuss current/hot topics, and much more.

Indescribable Feelings

Indescribable Feelings

This past weekend, I was honored to share my poetry, in spoken word, for the first time. This task was not easy. I've always had a fear of speaking my poetry/writings due to the vulnerability. Now that I've conquered my fear, I decided to start sharing more. So here's a piece I wrote, previously, when imagining how unrequited love feels:

Laying in the dark while my body aches. Feelings aren’t too familiar But I’ve felt them before. The shakes. Sick to my stomach. Adrenaline is running. Intense pain. Like lightening bolts shooting through my veins. I’m fiending. For you. It’s too painful to let go. Of the feelings you give. I need to feel that rush. The high you take me on. Wanting you to be my whole world. Like the solar system. Cause you’re in my soul and system. On this cosmic journey. Shout out to Kanye and Solange too. Yea they’re greats. But not even the greats compare to you. But when the high subsides and I come to, I wonder why I’m even feeling you. You don’t chase me like they do. You don’t pray for me like he do. You barely check for me. But when you do, nothing compares. The mental stimulation. Slowly strumming my thoughts. Masturbating my mind. Baby, you have full control. Then you taste me. Love me slow and good. Between my legs. Where we hide. Our secret place. But I gotta let go. I gotta be more than the girl you check for when you need a girl to check for. I gotta be more. But none of my logic curves this pain I’m feeling in every vein. The same poison that made me love you, want you. Is killing me. That feeling. The indescribable one that I get when I’m with you. I just want you to feel it for me too. Even if it’s just for a moment in time. A glimpse into what it could be. When THAT feeling is mutual. Is intriguing to me. You’re so intriguing to me. Everyone says you’re darkness that leaves me blind. But even light requires a little darkness to shine. But your darkness is dimming me. So I’m fighting myself because I know we can no longer be.
— Neauxlamade
Surviving the Storm

Surviving the Storm